2 years later

The very words I wrote almost 2 years to this date... Written on Sept 10,2011

I use to sit at my job and wonder .. why am I here. I spend most of my life right here in this building . Am I doing what I enjoy? Well I was to some degree. But I was never truly happy. The truth of the matter was like alot of people I was stuck. I needed the money and this was a good job and I enjoyed what I was doing . But I dreamed of being one of those people that got to do what they really wanted in life. The ones who became what they wanted to be. I came across a quote that inspired me . It said... its never to late to be what you might have been -George Eliot-. Little did I know that those twelve words were about to change my life. Ever since I can remember I have been taking pictures. I may not have always had a nice camera but I was capturing every moment of my life . I always felt I had the vision and the talent but lacked in a proper camera and the chance to .. take a chance so to speak. In high school I was able to use the SLRS at school and bring my images to life in the darkroom they made available. Back then things were alot more complicated if you planned to produce your own images. Now flash forward to the present and everything has changed. That is everything but how to actually create an exposure. I stared at those 12 words and read them over and over. And in those moments an idea was born. I would take the talent that God himself has given me and do what I love. And this is were the story begins....... one step at a time I will become who I should have been.

Aug 30,2012

"Keep your heart open to dreams. For as long as there's a dream, there is hope, and as long as there is hope, there is joy in living." Anonymous

Its been almost two years since I started my journey . And what a journey it has been. I have grown so much in the last two years . As a mother, photographer, a wife, homemaker. To say this has been an easy ride would be lying but it has been an enjoyable one . It is said that God will put the right people in your path , those who will help you become what you were meant to be. And he sure has not given me a short supply. I am so grateful for all the people whom I have met , and even not ever met but have become a part of my life. My journey would have been much harder had they not been there to lend a hand to me. Some believe that to get to the top you should climb over everyone in your way and don't look back. I believe that the best way to get to the top is to push the person in front of you from behind . Lift them higher, help them get to the top . Because sooner or later when they reach it guess what. So do you. I look back now at when I started and can not believe how my work has changed. Everyday I try to photograph something. Even if it is just a flower. Because everyday is a chance for me to learn something new. And of course my family has always been my favorite target. My children are so use to being photographed it has become second nature to them. Some day when I leave this world for the next I will surely leave behind a legacy that my children will cherish. For no matter where this journey takes me I will be documenting there lives every single day. This is a sometimes frustrating business to break into. Spending hours and hours trying to come up with the new best idea, the promotion that everyone will love. Striving to always be better then the day I was before. Never really happy with my work no matter how perfect of a shot I get. I am always challenging myself for bigger, better, the learning curve in this business never ends. In these few short years I have now become active in school and church script programs. I am volunteering my time and images to the humane society to help find homes for the animals there who desperately are in need of a portrait makeover. I have even had several chances to photograph horses. One of my photography bucket list entry's. Senior portrait's, family sessions, pet portraits, threw all of them one thing has not changed. I still love to photograph children. It was my first love and continues to be . There is something so precious to me to have the opportunity to follow around a child and capture there little personalities. Yes I will probably never be able to pull of a 30 min session. When I first began for some reason I believed this is what I needed to do. I guess that is part of what makes me different. To get what I want ... takes time. So if you are booking a session with me plan on at least an hour. I cant ever seem to walk away from a session any sooner then that when it comes to children and families. Yes I have been told I over shoot sessions. But you know ... that is ok . Because at the end of the day when I am in front of my computer and I see the images I captured. And I begin to piece little glimpse of there lives together . When a photograph of a child can bring a lump in my throat and they are not even my flesh and blood.. well to me that is priceless. And well worth the extra effort. And now two years later my story continues.. having become who I should have been and striving to be so much more. Thank you to everyone whom has helped me get this far. I am truly grateful!



 When I was a little girl I dreamed of one day having a horse of my own. We had a family friend whom had a couple of horses and I was able to go there riding sometimes. I loved the awesome freedom that came with galloping across the field. Like I was flying. I dreamed of having a all black horse.. like THE BLACK STALLION. What little girl didn't love that movie. More even then horses I loved unicorns. My whole bedroom was full of these beautiful mythical creatures. I remember the first time I saw Legend.. a movie with a princess, a handsome lover, mythical creatures, good verses evil , and the unicorns.. the unicorns were so beautiful they took my breath away. I dreamed about being the princess in that story. To have the horse , the prince charming... So when I got the chance to take photographs at the Adams County 4H horse and pony project.. two passions coming together. I couldn't say no.  

 Watching these young girls and young men compete together with there horses reminded me of what I so longed for at that age. How lucky they are to be living their own dreams. As I am lucky to be living one of mine. To use my gifts to capture these magnificent animals and the love they have for there riders.. was pure heaven to me. I find it truly incredible the respect these horses have for their riders..and there riders for them.. it really touched my heart to watch them interact

 I was in my element, that is for sure. Camera in hand, the smell of hay and horses... couldn't think of a place I'd rather have been at that moment. So if my portraits of this day look dreamy to you .. perhaps its just that part of me .. that is coming out in my images... a part of me I'd tucked away close to my heart .  I was truly blessed with this opportunity and I am thankful for the hours I spent there capturing moments of what I wanted to be as a child, as a young adult. Perhaps I was living a small part of their dreams while I was sharing my own ... My love of light, human nature, and my passion for taking just a moment in time.. a second .. and tucking it away so that years later can look back at those images and remember for that moment in your life your were truly happy.

Finding me ...

When I started on this journey I was told that I needed to find me. My brand.. what I have to offer the world that is different then everyone else. I found this assignment to be ironic since part of this journey was about tapping into a part of myself that had been set on the back burner for so many years. I never truly thought I would be were I am today. Years ago when digital did not even exist and I was in high school. I was an intern for the photography department. I spent hours in the dark room watching images appear before me turning thoughts in my mind of how I would build my own dark room someday. Part of me still wishing I had one. We all have dreams when we are young.. few of us ever due what we truly wanted to . We find that the road we were traveling on leads you in many different directions. And somehow we leave behind our dreams, dropping bread crumbs behind us so that perhaps we may find our way back to them somehow.

In finding my way back to who I should have been , who I wanted to be..I won't lie and say it has been an easy ride. Photography is a never ending learning process. Just when you think you have it, you look back 3 months later and see that you are so much better then you were the day before. I work hard every single day to teach myself , to become better then my last shot.. to surprise myself.

Learning from others, endless tutorials , books, studying light in itself.

God has gifted me with so much in this life. When you study light and how it touches the world you begin to see things differently. Suddenly a drive down the highway is not just a destination. Its hay bales glowing in the sun, fields of nothing more then weeds bathed in the beautiful golden light. You start to see that everything in this world is beautiful with light. And when you come to that place where you do SEE IT.. you know that your road is headed in the right direction.